Blog Post

Julie Lamb • September 28, 2018

You are not alone

September is National Suicide Awareness Month and I have been meaning to talk about this for a while, but admit that this is hard for me. Eight years ago my older brother committed suicide. He had been struggling for years with depression, and attempted a few times, but seemed to be in a good place. His birthday is in September, and he would have been 44 this year.

We never know how someone is suffering. We never know what their demons may be. We all admit to feeling shocked, appalled, angry and/or heartbroken when we hear about something committing suicide, but sometimes we also feel alone. Suicide isn't talked about except when we bring attention to it in "suicide awareness month", but it needs to be talked about more often. I hesitated sharing my story for a long time because I don't want to hear people's well meaning advice or criticism. How often do we hear people say negative things about those that commit suicide leaving the survivors to mourn alone? Or how often do we shame people into not getting the help they need because we don't talk about the hard things? LIFE IS HARD!! and we should support each other ALWAYS!!

So, I wanted to share some interesting facts: statistically suicide is higher among white middle aged males. Suicide has increased across the country but is highest in higher elevation states such as Montana, Alaska Wyoming, Utah and Idaho. Veterans account for 14% of suicides nationwide though they make up only 8% of the U.S. population (according to the most recent VA report ).

While we may not always know if someone is thinking about suicide, there are some warning signs:

If you or someone you know are struggling with these thoughts and feelings, there is hope and help. I have the National Suicide Number and information at the top of the page or you can contact me. Make it a point to talk to those you love and be a source of help, not hindrance. There is no shame in getting help for you or the ones we love. I wish I could give my brother another hug or tell him how much he means to me. In the meantime I will continue to spread awareness. Please contactme if you are in need of help.

By Julie Lamb April 18, 2023
Julie Lamb, licensed therapist and life coach has helped thousands of people take control of their mindset and careers by helping them understand their most powerful strategic asset, their brain. Join her as she takes you on a path of personal growth and understanding of the who, what and whys of your thoughts and behaviors. Have you ever thought to yourself, “Why in the world did I do that?” If yes, this is the podcast for you! Follow on: Apple Spotify Google Amazon
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How many of us say "I'm sorry" as a reflex, even if we aren't sorry? Or maybe you don't say "I'm sorry" but instead you say or think: I didn't mean it How do I make this right It's my fault Often apologizing is a a form of people pleasing. It is easier to just take the blame and move on then to actually try and change something. One of the biggest offenders comes from trying to please our family members. And when we don't we have a huge amount of guilt. I am giving you permission to stop saying "I'm sorry". Here are 8 things you need to stop apologizing for right now: Setting Boundaries : A boundary is simply a way to protect yourself physically and emotionally. One of the hardest parts of setting boundaries is believing that it is okay to set that boundary. Think about what you need to feel okay and then set a boundary to respect that. Choosing to Put Yourself First: It is okay to acknowledge when you need "me"time. We have all heard the analogy of putting our own mask on before helping someone put theirs on. When we are drained, we don't have anything else to give. So, maybe you need to set the boundary of protecting your "me" time so that you can give more of yourself later. Believing in Yourself and Going After Your Dreams: What if you wanted to do something different that all those around you...can that be okay? You are so much more capable then you give yourself credit for. No one can take away your dreams unless you allow them to. So, dream big: what do you want from this life? Having High Standards and Expectations: Never lower your beliefs just to fit in. If you don't want to do something, then don't. We tell our kids this all the time, so why do we try and become something we aren't? Wanting More out of Life: Just because no one in your family does it, doesn't mean you cannot. How many times do we applaud those that are the first in their family to do something? Why not applaud yourself for taking a path that makes you happy. Needing Some Alone Time: As an introvert, I totally relate. It also goes with needing to recharge yourself. Step away, take a break, and then good things will happen. Outgrowing People that Had A Chance to Grow With You: It's okay to change friends. Many of us don't have the same friends from high school. And many of us make new friends that challenge us to grow and move forward. Be the one that challenges others to keep moving forward. Saying No with No Explanation: No means no and that is okay. Often when someone wants an explanation it is because they don't respect boundaries. You can tell someone when something is not okay and also have the courage to walk away. Take a look at the list of 8 things to NEVER apologize for. Which one do you want to make stronger? If you are ready to stop apologizing and move forward in your life, set up an appointment with me today to help you be your best self.
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Anxiety, Depression and Trauma, can be extremely tricky...one day you feel fine, and the next things feel out of control. I created a list of 5 things to ask yourself everyday to just check where you are at: 1. How am I feeling today, mentally and physically: Anxiety will manifest in your body as headaches or stomachaches. so make sure you take a moment to consider how you are handling all the things around you. 2. What am I thinking about the most: In the Anxiety Workbook I share how our thoughts create our feelings. If you are thinking a lot about things you cannot control, how is that howing up in your feelings? 3. When did I last do something just for me: I mention eating because it is so important to take care of our basic needs. Are you eating regularly, and what are you eating? 4. Am I tired: I get it, life can be filled with so many things that drain us. Are you getting enough sleep to tackle those things? Studies have shown that the best sleep occurs between the hours of 10 pm - 2 pm. Are you sleeping during those times? 5. What can I do today that will bring me joy: Are you scheduling time during your day for something you love, or want to do? Having something to look forward to will help in all those moments of anxiety. If you feel that one or more areas are off, take a look at what might need to change. If you would like help getting them back on track, schedule an appointment where we can talk about how I can help coach you through your anxiety. xx Julie P.S. Don't forget to follow me on Facebook where I share more tips and stories.
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